I Am Am !?
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“Birmingham?!” she utters.
Birmingham… I ponder,
My head slowly rises as the peak of my cap reveals the petite figure stood before me.
“Yes?” I reply
“Are you not coming out tonight?”
Outwardly I smile and simply shake my head,
But inwardly I sigh in the knowledge that my companion has already known the answer. She asks, not in curiosity of whether or not I want to go, but simply to gain gratification in the fact that my answer will always remain the same. As I leave to go back to my room and the bus departs, “ravers” onboard. I start to realise that my friends here see me as a hope for themselves.
It’s my first month and a half of university, 120 miles from home, restriction and the long arm of my Father. But His wisdom, direction and resolve still remain engraved in my mind. Proverbs 22:6 clearly manifests in its fullness through my Father’s instruction. But wisdom generated from past obedience can only be perpetuated by current identity.
So what is my identity?
University has been hard, University as a Christian has been harder, despite obvious challenges right throughout student and youth culture, the hardest thing has been the feeling of complete isolation. You see one thing that I wanted to make clear at University was that I am a Christian. It sets a standard and an expectation for me from them that I need to exceed. Not to prove myself. But in order to encourage myself not to fall into certain pitfalls that I may be an example, not going to raves hasn’t necessarily disadvantaged me socially, it is the fact that despite there being many to socialise with, there is no-one to fellowship with.
It’s been fun being awake until 3am and meeting people from all stretches of the globe, but all the practical jokes, laughter and “deep” conversations are nothing compared to the reciprocation of two who dwell in Christ.
So now I find my identity is shifting. The alias “Birmingham” although perpetrating my inclusion only further magnifies my solitude, because many only know me as Birmingham. What was once pseudonymous has now become synonymous with who I am recognised to be. Rather than represent my place of origin I have now personified it to the point that the predominately “Londoner” student population have formed an expectation of Birmingham from “Birmingham”
In the same way we must represent Christ to the world, so that the pseudonym Christian, to be Christ-like, will spur us on to make ourselves synonymous with Christ, that we may personify HIM and form an expectation of Christ from the world by walking in righteousness by the grace of god and through the power of the Holy Spirit.
Because despite the trials of peer pressure and temptation, inclusion and solitude, two things have remained; the wisdom and direction my Father imparted into me and my undying faith and desire to love and serve the Lord.
Andrew - RTS
 | | Confessions of an Addict | | I have a (not-so) secret confession to make: I AM A FACEBOOK ADDICT. I love checking up on what’s happening with friends and family through the social networking site.
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